Music

“We had two drummers playing African drums and a saxophonist. I hadn't planned to dance down the aisle, but the music just affected everyone,” Carlos recalls. “My best man started dancing as he went down the aisle and when it was my turn I danced, too. The whole thing was impromptu. I was just moved. The music lifted my spirits.“Music is an important and integral -- as well as “Traditional”-- part of most wedding ceremonies. Music lifts spirits, moves the body and soul, and brings people together, sometimes more than words do. Spend some time thinking about the kind of music you want to set the mood and create the ambiance for your wedding.

The “Traditional" times for music at a wedding are before the Processional (the “Prelude”), during the Processional and the Recessional, and after the ceremony (the “Postlude”). Most officiants are willing to incorporate music at other points, too -- after a reading, for instance, or during the lighting of a unity candle. Also consider choosing a hymn or a song that all the congregation can sing together in celebration of your vows.

If your ceremony site has a music director on staff, arrange a meeting to discuss your ideas and find out what the director suggests. (She may have sample tapes for you to listen to and choose from.) If you want to bring in other musicians and determined during your interview with your officiant these things are acceptable at the site, you may still need to coordinate your plans with the director.

After you've developed a plan for your ceremony, submit it to your officiant(s), in person or in writing, for review. Their knowledge and experience can help you shape the final details.
African Drummers

Visit Afrocentric cultural centers and ask for names of drummers who teach or who accompany dance classes. “I am always happy to play for weddings,” says Madou Dembele, who plays for classes at the Djoniba Dance and Drum Centre in New York City. “I played for weddings at home [Ivory Coast] and here, also,” he laughs, adding, “It's totally different!”

Be sure to discuss with the drummers the style of drumming you want, or at least ask them to describe their conception of wedding accompaniment so that you will be sure what to expect at your reception. “In my country we play right next to the bride and groom. Here, when I played at my friend's wedding, they wanted us to play soft, in the background. They had a flute playing with us,” says Dembele.

If you want a combination of African sounds and other music during the course of your reception, consider hiring drummers to play while you're eating and a band or a DJ for dancing later on.

Music in a Different Key: Islamic Practices
Muslims around the world celebrate marriage with a walimah, a party following the ceremony. Traditionally, the men and women celebrate separately with festive food (provided by the husband), song and dance. This is an opportunity for the normally covered women to dress in special clothes, do their hair, and wear makeup. They sing traditional songs from all the cultures represented, a cappella, and dance in every style from Western to African, accompanied only by a drum. The men have a similar party elsewhere, and at the end the groom comes to collect the bride (at which point all the women must re-cover themselves).

Contemporary Muslim practices vary widely, however, and couples may opt for a mixed party. (In some cases that may preclude pretty clothes and makeup for the women, and singing and dancing.) Many African Muslims and African-Americans drawing from those traditions enjoy mixed celebrations with drumming and dancing.

Reprinted from “Going to the Chapel” by the Editors of Signature Bride Magazine. Copyright 1998 by The Philip Lief Group, Inc. and KLCS Communications, Inc. (Signature Bride Magazine). Permission granted by G.P. Putnam's Sons, a division of Penguin Putnam Inc. All rights reserved. weddingchannel